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Imagine your wife/girlfriend changing bodies with your own mother. You have to fuck one to get them back to normal. Would you choose your mother’s body with your girlfriend’s mind? Or your girlfriend’s body who is now your mother?
I just want to drop a line here. I don’t think this question is at all relevant to this thread and in fact quite tasteless. It comes off as misogynistic and lack of respect for women and perhaps a contributing factor why this forum fails to attract diversity. I want to say your words carry meaning and perpetuate inaccurate stereotypes and representation of specific groups in society. This time I felt women were being disrespected and dismissed. We are here and participating too.
We just published a podcast where we discuss recent events, including this thread. There’s a list of other things we talked about on the podcast on the show notes here: What’s New in Chengdu, March 2015
I just want to drop a line here. I don’t think this question is at all relevant to this thread and in fact quite tasteless. It comes off as misogynistic and lack of respect for women and perhaps a contributing factor why this forum fails to attract diversity. I want to say your words carry meaning and perpetuate inaccurate stereotypes and representation of specific groups in society. This time I felt women were being disrespected and dismissed. We are here and participating too.
Perhaps it was in poor taste, but it was clearly a joke and not an actual attack upon women. We love women.
Perhaps it was in poor taste, but it was clearly a joke and not an actual attack upon women.
Let’s boil the question down to a more basic would-you-rather format:
Would you rather fuck your mom’s body or her mind?
Tasteless? It’s the same kind of cornball machismo shit you’d hear horny bike mechanics prattle out in bravado, behind a counter, surrounded by a bunch of other horny likeminded dudes.
Or we could go back to joking about how many donuts we could hang off our dicks. This is the very type of hilarious question that when kicking it with a bunch of girls you’d hear thrown around off hand.
Problem is, as a public forum, regardless of a lack of active input from different women in the community AND an undeniable imbalance in sexes amongst the expat community, I can see how women might see this sort of joke and think of it as what it is. Lame.
I can’t go all high and mighty cause I might say this same sort of thing in the comfort of my dude zone, surrounded by other horny dudes aiming to have a sword fight. But here there are apparently women within the community and if they are voicing their discomfort then maybe this sort of thing shouldn’t be taken so jokingly.
I for one feel guilty that I saw these questions, passed them off as just crude jokes and didn’t stop to think that it might offend someone out there and played the part of a voiceless bystander.
So here’s my question finally! Johnny! What are you thoughts on sex equality? Do you feel these kind of questions for your “ask me anything” convey the open spirit of a constructive format to introduce yourself to your community and potential customers?
Well said, Mr.Klink.
*Wags index finger at Vincent, staring judgingly* :p
I’m just kidding Vince. There has clearly been a case of culture clash.
Perhaps it was in poor taste, but it was clearly a joke and not an actual attack upon women. We love women.
Sure, the question was clearly a joke that did offend others not just women. Women were depicted in his question to Johnny as being voiceless and mockeries for others’ musing and to be laughed about. I’m saying that it isn’t funny and it is offensive.
You forgot to ask a question, hyobin. : )
Here it is, what relevance does the question you ask have on this specific thread? how do you feel now knowing you’ve wrote words on a public space where a woman, myself, did find it extremely offensive and did speak out? I really would like to hear you out.
Well said, Mr.Klink. *Wags index finger at Vincent, staring judgingly* :p I’m just kidding Vince. There has clearly been a case of culture clash.
Could you elaborate on the culture clash you’re talking about? Are you talking about a clash between men and women? Between language, culture, food, race or what?
Here it is, the fact that you categorize it as a culture clash makes it evident you also don’t see this culture as an embracing one of all sexes, race, sexual orientation, and all the layers it does embody.
And if you saw my voicing of an opinion as a culture clash, I’m quite surprised this thread which had no problem reading questions such as the one in question, can’t handle some honesty and cultural relevancy.
The question deserved to be called out and it was called out to be discussed with rooted opinions and thoughts.
Everything is fine. People have opinions. People like drama. It’s where they derive their identity from, their egoic sense of self. They see a random question and start labelling the whole thing with judgement and interpretation, analyzing the question upside down and putting it in a little box in their heads. And then they start pointing fingers to anyone that doesn’t comply with their own little made up mind patterns. Fortunately, no matter what’s going on inside anyone’s head, it doesn’t define reality.
I for one really believe it’s an interesting question. It’s intriguing and hard to answer. I’m not even joking. If you really try to imagine the hypothesis of your
girlboyfriend and yourmomdad switching bodies, as if it were real. And I mean real. Who would you end up choosing? Who would you “make love to”, in order to get things back to normal?“Ask me anything.” The question is not ment to be anything more than what it is you see – just a question. If you rather take things personal, that’s okay too, but I’m afraid I can’t help you with that.
Here it is, what relevance does the question you ask have on this specific thread? how do you feel now knowing you’ve wrote words on a public space where a woman, myself, did find it extremely offensive and did speak out? I really would like to hear you out.
So here’s my question finally! Johnny! What are you thoughts on sex equality? Do you feel these kind of questions for your “ask me anything” convey the open spirit of a constructive format to introduce yourself to your community and potential customers?
I don’t disagree with the points either of you make, but these questions are equally pointless. This thread is supposed to be about discussing Johnny 5, entrepreneurship in Chengdu, Johnny’s background, and pastries. Donuts are a thing of joy. Please lower your alert level, social justice police.
I don’t disagree with the points either of you make, but these questions are equally pointless. This thread is supposed to be about discussing Johnny 5, entrepreneurship in Chengdu, Johnny’s background, and pastries. Donuts are a thing of joy. Please lower your alert level, social justice police.
In truth I think his original response to the question was tasteful and did plenty to already pre-empt even needing to ask it. Just didn’t want to get pegged for not asking a question.
“Ask me anything.” The question is not ment to be anything more than what it is you see – just a question. If you rather take things personal, that’s okay too, but I’m afraid I can’t help you with that.
You’re original wording is crude, dude, and you got called out. It is a thinker of a question and if looked at the right way, really can tickle the ol’ skull pickle. But if you want to ask anything, why not do it in a way that doesn’t rain on someone’s parade? Judging by the eloquence of your last remark, you seem quite capable of it.
I think that’s what the conflict here is digging at. We probably could hash out half a dozen blanket statements we could say that would piss off most of this forum’s viewing audience: Regardless of one’s ability to keep a cool head or label something as personal opinion. But where’s the value in that?
Let’s just move forward and remember that women eat donuts too. As well as lanky white guys, Chinese people, African medical students, English teachers, etc.
Hey everyone,
I just got a text message that my forum had gotten too real for its own good. I said in the beginning that I would answer every question that came in. I did this because I felt that in a forum this small it wouldn’t be unfair to cherry pick questions (this practice is a necessity on reddit given the number of questions one may receive in a popular AMA).
Hyobin,
Did you read my answer? If you did, you can see that I never actually answer the question he asks. Not that I was particularly uncomfortable, in fact I spoke at length with friends about what I would actually do if put in that scenario. I felt uneasy giving a whole hearted answer, considering my position in the community. I felt it more important to manage my reputation a local business owner, mentor and all around good guy. I don’t understand why you are so offended by it, I believe we should be at a point socially where we are able to ask each other just about anything. While I agree with Charlie that I intended this to be a way to introduce myself to Chengdu expats and provide a forum to get to know more about what I do, who I am etc. I also understood that with the term “Reddit style” I could get in to some pretty deep waters full of some pretty divisive questions. I didn’t think of the question from a man vs. women standpoint in the same way (being half black) I don’t think the white asshole that I just met is being an asshole because of the color of my skin. In my opinion he is just an asshole. I can imagine you might see this blindness as a personal downfall on my part. The fact that I am not controlled by a this vs that, feminist, masochist, white, black, fat, thin perspective might make me the wrong person to really get in to this issue. I am sorry you were offended and I did my best to answer the question, however absurd it was with white gloves.
Mr Klink,
What are my thoughts on gender equality?
I have absolute respect for women rights, I like living in China where women seem to do every job right along side their male counterparts. From SWAT team to construction worker it is refreshing to see women taking on the tougher tasks on a daily basis. With that said I will touch on some of the finer points of gender equality. I was raised by a single mother, my dad was a drug addict, he had already left one family before he started mine and by the time I was one he was finished with that too. I do believe, in my experience there are rolls that men and women are better at. While my mother did her best, I personally think I would have been better off with a male in my life. You may disagree with this, however if you look at nature male and females don’t take on the exact same rolls in the animal kingdom.
I also think the strongest women are the ones who aren’t constantly pointing out what they are doing and how they are doing it better than men. The women I respect the most are those who just, do. I say that for men as well. Parading around talking about how great of a father/mother you are doesn’t make you a great mother/father. If we made more educated and rational decisions about having children and took time to find a person who can match us as an equal perhaps we wouldn’t have a bunch of scenarios where we have to take on every roll alone. That being said, I wouldn’t exist if my own mother had followed my advice.
When people speak about culture clash I think they may be talking about an open America vs a more conservative China. I have only been here for 5 months but from what I can see (not to offend, and correct me if I am wrong) is a society full of a majority that does not question. A culture of saving face and shame for many topics that Americans discuss openly. My mother spoke to me about sex when I was very young, she didn’t answer my questions in a crude way but took time to explain my origins in the best she could. My friends girl friend has a 21 year old son and would never dare to bring up sex with him under any circumstances. If you don’t know how babies are made, if your only point of reference in sexually is the porn you share among friends how are you supposed to grow to be a passionate adult. Without parents who are involved in your upbringing and without the ability to question, to move beyond a “because thats how mamma did it” mentality. How can any of us become positive and contributing members of society? This is why a question some of the methodology behind religion as well. That is a whole other topic though.
I do hope this shed some light on my feeling on the important issue. Lets keep this forum open, all sarcasm aside I would like to hear more ideas. this type of discussion in an environment where opinions can be voiced in an uncensored way is healthy for humanity as a whole. Let’s also keep the questions coming.
Ray, your answer to what we do with the left over donuts is coming!
P.S. Sorry I didn’t quote everyone, I am busy making donuts and didn’t have time to risk messing up my response.
P.P.S #DropsTheMic
Johnny5, sensational AMA. I’ve heard that in certain cities one can eat very well from donut shop dumpsters. Urban myth? With this in mind: a)where is your dumpster located? b)is your dumpster clearly labelled? c)what time should I be raiding this dumpster? No seriously, I’m curious about how you plan how much to make (basically how do you anticipate demand)? Does it differ on the weekend? Do you eat the unsold donuts? Do you even have unsold donuts? Not hustling for half price semi-fresh donuts, just curious. I notice that some bakeries offer discounts for yesterday’s stuff. What’s your policy on this practice? is it crass to do this? Thanks.
I will answer these quickly and in order:
1) Totally true there are left overs, I have seen pictures of the dunking dumpsters
a) b) c) Mike’s wife’s mother has created some kind of donut black market for the left over donuts where she trades them for various things, none of which I have personally seen but I think they may be for food (for staff meal of the pizza place) All I know is she takes them away each morning/night and I never see or hear of them again.
I will not cheapen my brand by selling the donuts for half price the next day, I want everyone who walks in to have the freshest possible donut and I fear if I offer the option to have a lower quality thing for less too many people will never have the chance to have the “real thing.”
I do my best to anticipate demand and I am usually pretty good, sometimes I am very wrong and we sell out at 3pm or we have a shit ton left at 9pm. It’s not a science and I am always trying to be better at predicting demand.
Yes, I actually meant culture shock. Like John said, in western culture we can openly talk and joke about such issues while in the East it’s a no-no. We also heavily rely on sarcasm, especially in the UK. It’s the only thing we are good at now 😀
Couple of things:
- This AMA was bringing in questions irrelevant to Johnny’s business from page one and to try to stop discussion of irrelevant topics at this point just because they are irrelevant is disingenuous. Johnny asked people to ask anything, and some have plumbed the depths of their deranged minds to test the limits.
- I don’t think the appropriate response to someone saying they are offended is to tell them to be less sensitive. hyobin interpreted the extremely tasteless hypothetical “would you rather” as misogynistic. We don’t have to agree with her, but we can’t tell her how to feel about it.
- Likewise, hyobin, I don’t think it’s totally on point to mention that question without giving some credit to the way Johnny answered it or how other members have emerged to converse with you about it. I’m not sure who you feel is perpetuating what stereotypes, but Johnny did a great job of offsetting the offensiveness of the original question with an answer full of respect and admiration. And Mr. Klink has offered some self-awareness to the mix. I think you pointing out its potential hurtfulness is a good conversation starter! But please don’t conflate other forum-members’ poor sensitivity to potentially misogynistic things with an unwelcome attitude towards women. I am a firm believer that this forum will only become a better place as more people come to use it, and I am sorry if that question made you feel disrespected. We can all do a better job of putting ourselves in someone else’s shoes and trying to understand what it’s like to be them.
- Johnny, you da best maann. You deeed it.
Everything is fine. People have opinions. People like drama. It’s where they derive their identity from, their egoic sense of self. They see a random question and start labelling the whole thing with judgement and interpretation, analyzing the question upside down and putting it in a little box in their heads. And then they start pointing fingers to anyone that doesn’t comply with their own little made up mind patterns. Fortunately, no matter what’s going on inside anyone’s head, it doesn’t define reality.
A dash of dismissiveness, a pinch of condescension, and a serving of solipsism does not a good point make. But you are right about one thing: staying in your own head won’t help you understand reality. That’s where listening comes in. So when someone says they’re offended, maybe you should listen instead telling them everything is fine.
As the guy who started the irrelevant “have you ever been in a speedboat question?”, a few points:
a)if you are familiar with reddit AMA’s it’s common to ask totally ridiculous, unrelated questions. If you peruse reddit you’ll see some fantastic AMA responses to these kinda questions. If you’ve never seen an AMA your first reaction might be “who is this troll?” (i actually expected to be called out for this, cos after all, forums can’t be irreverent or fun, right? The internet is only for the dissemination of vital info, right? 🙂
b)Thankfully Johhny5 handled the unrelated questions like a true redditor. I actually asked him about this in his shop, introducing myself as “the guy who asked the ridiculous speedboat question”. Johnny smiled and i knew I’d met a fellow redditor.
But Brendan should definitely be banned or suspended. His question crossed the line! 🙂Or we could go back to joking about how many donuts we could hang off our dicks.
Yes, let’s do that, since;
a) it’s a joke
b) in the style of a reddit AMA
c) devoid of any political, social, geographic, or gender specific intent (et al)
d) plus it’s a- joke
in the style of a
- Reddit AMA
Had Johnny been a Jenny I might have come up with an equally crude question aimed squarely at his vagina since again (just for those of you who missed the actual point of this in the first place, because you stumbled into a time machine that whipped you back to 1986, when political correctness and not being able to form humour around any subject without catching wrath from some ages old beleaguered institution or club deemed it unacceptable, along with free speech) this is a thread
- in the style of a Reddit AMA
Did we get a number for donuts hanging off your dick Johnny?
Is it…
5?
This and other important questions need answering, like ‘do ladyboys take turns’?, and ‘what if your Mum was your Dad’?
Thank you for watching.
It comes off as misogynistic and lack of respect for women and perhaps a contributing factor why this forum fails to attract diversity.
Bless you Hyo, I do see where you’re coming from, but in defense of Vincent (having known him for some time) he is the opposite of misogynistic. He does maybe spend too much time on the internet though, which makes him well versed in forum derived sarcasm.
Additionally I think the reason this forum has failed to attract ‘diversity’ is not quite so straight forward. There have been a few posts over the course of time that were knocked out cold by off track debate, which itself ends up alienating members/visitors.
…and a serving of solipsism…
…won’t help you understand reality.
We’re conjecturing ‘reality’ with our donuts now!?
Here’s a reality:
I’m Johnny 5 – Ask Me Anything
Sarcasms only on a postcard, please.
😀
Intentional umbrage-taking is a form of trolling.
This feels like wisdom…
When did "trolling" change from subtly winding people up, to just being a dick? from AskReddit
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