"Is China Real Life?"

[Dan]

I asked this question on /r/China and got a lot of interesting responses. Interested to hear if there are any thoughts on the matter here. Or you can just read the comments, some of which are more insightful than others. Anyways, here’s the question:

Do you think life in China is any less “real” than your life back home? Take this question however you like. I only feel compelled to ask because I’ve heard foreigners from various backgrounds and in various occupations dismiss life in China as “not real life” and I just want to get a little more perspective on the matter. Thanks in advance.

[Charlie]

I associate the “not real” judgement being targeted at the deadbeat expat lifestyle, which China is (becoming less) conducive to. Expats are afforded opportunities here that they aren’t in their home country, but they had to take a leap of faith to get here. It’s a different side of the planet which is governed by a different set of rules, but you have to make significant sacrifices to be here.

In the states right now there are countless people with degrees who are working menial jobs and making minimum wage, when almost any of them could easily come to China and work less and make more. Is that less real? I personally don’t think so. Living in the African jungle wouldn’t be less real, but it would be surreal and other-worldly, like China is to a lot of people who haven’t been here.

[Vincent]

Some great responses on reddit. I had the exact same discussion a while ago, with a friend who visited for 3 months. In my opinion living in China is a reality like any other. It might not be permanent, it might be completely different, it might get absurd at times, but it’s still a reality – and thus “real”, with all its perks and quirks. Being there is a choice, just as staying home is a choice. If you’re there for 3 years, it’s real – for 3 years. Just as living in North Korea would probably be as fake as it can possibly get, it would still be a reality as long as you’re there. People are pretty obsessed with the future, with where they should be, where they should get, what they should achieve, what they should be doing, what they should have, and every single day is only a means to get “there”. If you’re constantly living life from that perspective (which could be anywhere in the world), that seems less “real” to me, because it does not even exist anywhere outside of your mind. As long as you live in China, that is your reality. That is the present moment. Enjoy it every day, for however long it takes.

[Dana Garber]

This thread is funny and made me think when my mother-in-law, who mistakingly thinks I keep her son from moving back to America, said to me “You live in la-la land over there (referring to China) and you don’t have to face anything!”  I could not help but giggle, but knew it was really pointless to tell her China is anything but “la-la land”…whatever that even means!

Actually a big reason I left China because it was all to real!  The cheating, the manners, the business ethics, the get rich at ANY cost mentality, etc…  Of course, before all you “China is so wonderful” people jump down my throat, realize I understand fully all countries have their flaws, some are just more tolerable than others.  Maybe China represents the way people want to behave, the me-me, only me society, but can’t because it just would not be acceptable and you might get shoot if in the wrong country?  Sure I’ve wanted to fart at the wrong time, spit indoors, pick my nose for ten straight minutes, drive on the sidewalk to avoid waiting in line, but something tells me not to.  My upbringing, society, just a sense of that others might find it gross, who really knows. Some humility?

On my way to real “la-la land” Thailand, I overheard a Chinese flight attendant try to explain to a Thai attendant that the Chinese are so unruly on a flight is because no one ever told them how to behave!!!  The Thai attendant wasn’t buying it, but was being polite.  The complete lack of respect toward any flight rules were ignored because nobody spelled it out for them that a seat belt sign that is lit up means SIT DOWN and STAY DOWN.  The excuse train pulls in!  Too much!

So yes living in China is certainly real in my opinion, all too real.

[WoodWERD]

Agree with most all of the above. For me, coming from a career as a cube-jockey where I worked 40-50 hours a week and had your average social life, things still feel pretty surreal after a year here. I chalk a lot of that up to spending the first 8 months out in the sticks where there were no foreigners and few English speakers. The rest I blame on my low level of Mandarin which I plan to focus on this year.

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